Thursday Night Round Up

30 Nov

30 Rock: We’re Registered At Popcorn Palace

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When I saw the previews last week advertising a Liz Lemon wedding, I had mixed feelings. Liz Lemon is the feminist crusader who sings night cheese and celebrates Anna Howard Shaw Day instead of Valentine’s. Was her happy ending really marriage? 30 Rock, as always, handled it perfectly (God, I’m going to miss this show). After a negative pregnancy test, Criss and Liz are eating disco fries when they run into Dennis and Megan Duffy (probably no relation) and their adopted child. Dennis Subway Hero, Balloon Boy Con Artist, St. Patrick’s Day Reveler, Gas Leak Provoker Duffy was given a child, but Liz Lemon was not because of a stupid piece of paper. “So let’s do it,” Criss said. And with a Top Gun high five, their engagement was sealed. Please purchase wedding gifts from their registry at Popcorn Palace.

Jack tries to convince Liz to embrace her special day, but she will not cave to the “giant industry that preys on gender stereotypes to make adult women spend a ton of money and act like selfish children.” Down at the courthouse, Liz is surprised to see it is filled with people basking in their Special Day, even Mets fans, but Liz is insistant that her most special days were when her TV show got picked up, or when she got a fully pink Starburst sleeve. Criss first forgets his birth certificate, then invites Dennis and Megan to be their witnesses, and Liz finally snaps and justifies the whole episode and marriage while reinforcing just how much we all love her: “I’m Liz Lemon! My parents spent the money they saved up for my wedding on a PT Cruiser! I have been sure for a long time that this was never gonna happen, and I was fine with it! Ergo, it couldn’t matter! But A tiny little part of me that I hate wants to be a princess.”

And a special day it was, complete with Jack in a tux (it must be after 6), flowers stolen from a hospital by the Duffys, rings bought at a police auction, Tony Bennett, Criss in a grill, and Liz, who got to be a Princess. Leia.

Congratulations to the Lemon-Chros’!

Shout out to young Liz, played by Tina Fey’s daughter, Alice. That was quite the eye roll. Like mother, like daughter.

Parks & Rec: Pawnee Caviar 

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Among history’s most storied rivalries lay Yankees v. Red Socks, Cats v. Dogs, Brittany v. Christina, and Pawnee v. Eagleton. Lot 48 is at long last becoming a park, and the clear leading architect applicant, James, is from Eagleton. Leslie gives a resounding Hell No. Eagletonians are not to be trusted. Their town border sign says “Welcome to Pawnee: Good Luck With That” and they call their boogers “Pawnee caviar.” Ben convinces her to meet him, and they explore his latest project, a sprawling, ridiculously over the top utopian park filled with balloon animal artists and people who pick up your trash. Leslie is being outwardly rude to James until Ben forces her to say she’s sorry, initiating a long, hilarious sequence of apology attempts. Finally conceding, James’ employees come by the next day with the park model, a condescending insult of Pawnee with drool buckets, instructional showers, and trough buckets of cheeseburgers. It turns out James had no idea, but Leslie doesn’t find that out until after she covers his face in shaving cream. James’ model for the park, Pawnee Commons, is actually wonderful. After 4 long years, the infamous lot behind Ann’s house is finally becoming a park.

Andy is finding that being a weekend security guard for city hall in a small Indiana town is supremely boring, and enlists April to come entertain him. They embark on one of their role playing extravaganzas, this time Burt Macklen and Hitler’s daughter, until they find a lost kid in the building. Andy, not Burt, helps the kid find his mom, and Agent Macklen turns in his badge for good. It’s time for Officer Dwyer.

The rest of the Parks Department is helping Tom set up Rent-a-Swag. Tom is so determined to not repeat the mistakes of Entertainment 7wenty that he takes it too far to the other extreme. Rent-a-Swag has no swagger. Ann sets him straight, and Tom moves everything from his apartment, except his bed, to the store (“I basically live here now”), which I must say looks pretty baller. He even found a use for Chris’ staircase to no where.

Has anyone else noticed the lack of Ron Swanson lately? I think he had 2 lines this episode. What happened to his lady friend? Bring us more Swanson, as well as all the bacon and eggs you have.

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